Proof that one can do Big Science without involving Big Brother. A privately-funded boondoggle, for a change. The world's most expensive weight-loss clinic. The Emerald City of the Greens: "Pay no attention to those big tanks of oxygen behind the curtain!" An experiment successfully demonstrating that concrete soaks up oxygen: city-dwellers, take heed!
Pan paniscus, a forest-dwelling primate of central Africa. The bonobo shares 98% of its genes with its closest relatives, the chimpanzee (Pan troglodytes, Latin for "cave-dwelling ape"), and the human (Homo sapiens sapiens, "the ape that thinks it thinks"). Unlike the chimpanzee and the human, the bonobo does not engage in warfare, power politics, murder, or cannibalism. The bonobo species resolves conflict through sex rather than aggression -- bonobos would rather fuck than fight. (See "Bonobo Sex and Society" by Frans B. M. de Waal, Scientific American, March 1995.)
Political Wheaties: the breakfast of champignons. There is a popular saying to the effect that "Capital perorates, and bullshit perambulates," but in Washington and on Wall Street the two are frequently seen sharing a limousine.
An extinct land mammal of English-speaking North America. The common bum Hobo indolens seems to have been displaced from its ecological niche by the more recent species Hobo lunans, the homeless loon. The loon, with its piercing cry of "Gotta quatta? Gotta quatta?", is distinguishable from the bum only by a somewhat less steady gaze and significantly more aggressive foraging behavior.
A declamatory decal that makes your car or truck a vehicle of self-expression. Epitaphs for the living (if you call that living). Some of my favorite bumper stickers are these:
My child was Stoolie of the Month at Vacaville State Prison
ONLY USERS LOSE DRUGS California Institute for Men -- Class of '94
THE FOUNDING FATHERS WERE TERRORISTS FREEDOM FIGHTERS
You're either part of the parade or part of the road