Godling's Glossary: F

Fido Dei Apothecaria, a Holy Inquisition of thanatolaters bent on the redemption of those heretics who think they know better than Holy Mother State what's good for them. The doctrine of this sect is not well understood, for it is known that they aspire to catholic jurisdiction despite having a protestant constituency.
Fireworks, n.
Toy munitions made in Chinese slave-labor camps to celebrate American freedom. The deluxe assortment includes the following specialities:
  • Golden Shower Fountain
  • Flagrant Peach Blossom
  • Spectacular Eye Whacker
  • Sneaky Time Bomb
  • Dazzling Lady Chaser
  • Deafening Apocalypse
  • Righteous Fumigator
  • General Tzu's Blue Balls
  • Burning Tower of Virility
  • Flaming Armageddon -- LIGHT FUSE AND BACK AWAY
Folly, n.
Purposeful action planned poorly, i.e., by human beings. Folly is distinguished from stupidity thusly: the stupid person lacks mental horsepower, while the fool, possessing brains, is imperfectly perseverant in their application. This distinction is too subtle for many, and the fool is often confused with the idiot (when they are not being confused separately).
Frigid, adj.
An outmoded, politically incorrect slur; our correspondent Hanno Antagonist (Phil G. Fraering) prefers "cryosexual."
Fundamentalist, n.
One who thinks with his fundament.